Freedom of Expression as a Right
In a world where we believe our fundamental right is freedom and freedom of expression, I have to agree with Pope Francis: “If my good friend Dr. Gasparri says a curse word against my mother, he can expect a punch,” Francis said, throwing a pretend punch his way. “It’s normal. You cannot provoke. You cannot insult the faith of others.” He adds further that it is an “aberration” to kill in the name of God and said religion can never be used to justify violence.” (HuffPost).
A Talk By Marianne Williamson
Even freedom is not black and white. It reminded me of a talk by Marianne Williamson where she emphasized how democracy is a spiritual pursuit. Marianne was debating whether groups like the KKK should be allowed to march. What we want, she said was a country where people are free to say whatever they want, but that if any group that promoted hatred was out ‘organizing’, hopefully no one would show up.
Wouldn’t that be a wonderful world? The trouble is in our world today, people do show up, and they are prepared to be destructive towards others in the name of whatever they stand for. Terrorism in the name of God, betrayal over money, greed for title – demand for their ‘right way’ at any cost.
At what point do we collectively agree “we are not ok with that”? When it comes to condemning people, I’d argue nothing justifies it. Once you do this, you become the condemner – a “provacateur” as Pope Francis calls the extremists.
You Judge Others
You become the judge of others for what you deem to be ‘right’, where others become ‘wrong’, and no longer see each other as human beings.
We can certainly condemn behaviour – the destructive words and actions people make that are unloving, unkind, or violent, but to choose to insult, put down, or treat anyone to be-littling, and ridicule? It’s not Ok, otherwise it becomes Ok for everyone.
I’m not talking about humorous satire where the purpose is to constructively expose wider societal issues, but being mindful of attacking negatively that is really offending, controlling, humiliating or intimidating to justify your own ‘self-righteousness’. Relationships with even a hint of this energy has been proven not to thrive in the long-run.
Yet I see, and hear people condemning each other regularly with their loved ones without realizing the impact or justifying it. When things don’t go our way, we can yell at our children, blame our spouse, hurl insults at friends we believe ‘offended’ us that suffocates the ability to express ourselves freely.
A Disturbing Truth About Freedom of Expression
It runs rampant in the media reflected in millions of you-tube views to the point where its become acceptable as entertainment that reflects a disturbing reality: we are creating our own pain.
Imagine if you could live beyond all the drama, and suffering? What does it take to live your own life speaking your truth? The self-awareness of understanding where you are judging yourself, and judging others opens a door to a new level of trust within yourself, and with others.
When you open up unconditionally, others can show up authentically to use the freedom of expression to express themselves more and more. A new level of trust builds. Be mindful that you open a space to receive both constructive, and destructive sides of people. Are you willing, and able to face someone else’s fears? Will they see themselves or will they end up in ‘self-righteousness’ condemning you with blame and anger? Can you discern whether they live from love or fear?
I used to believe the goal is to love everyone. Isn’t that what Gandhi, and Mother Theresa did, and what Christ came to teach us? Turns out love wasn’t black and white either. How do you love anyone who chooses to kill, and has no remorse? What about people who condemn you falsely based on their self perception that doesn’t align with yours?
The boss who creates a living hell for the whole company? The in-laws who look down on you for not meeting their expectations? The friend you’ve given your heart, and soul who isn’t willing to listen to your side? The spouse who is so disconnected from their self, they can’t hear you, no matter what you say?
At what point do you say – enough is enough?
Love requires compassion, and understanding, but you can do it from a safe distance! Anyone who lives from a place where they control, and condemn does not experience the same level of self-love that has become part of you because if they did, they could not choose their current path. The extent, and quality of love you can give is based on your own ability to not attack by criticizing or judging yourself – to love yourself unconditionally.
5 Uncommon Views of Freedom of Expression & Loving Yourself
Here’s how:
1) Let go of that voice that says “how could I have done that?” and replace it with “Ok, I chose to do that, how do I want to show up next time?” What am I willing to do to get me there? Who do I need to learn from? Whose energy do I need to be surrounded with? Who do I need to let go of?
2) Let go of criticizing, complaining, and judging other people. Notice that this is the energy of those who have lives that are consistently facing drama, suffering, and struggle to create lasting lifetime connections that are authentic. Distance yourself from this energy – it will open a space to hold more of the kind of loving energy you want.
3) Let go of worrying what anyone thinks, and step into what you want, value, and are willing to stand up for. Speak what matters without making anyone else wrong with “Here’s what I notice, here’s how I see it, here’s what isn’t working for me…what do you see, how do you feel, what do you notice?”
4) Pay close attention to who do you NOT have the freedom to express yourself with. Why not? Is it you, or is it them? Just notice, and make a conscious effort to minimize your connections with those you can’t be yourself with, and maximize your connections with those you can 🙂 Notice if your experiences are feeling happier, more exciting, lighter.
5) Be careful of ‘being too nice’ that disguises as ‘accommodating’ to other people’s values that you would not choose for yourself through a need to please. We may think this is loving ‘unconditionally’ or being understanding, even accepting, but when you can’t say no, or are afraid to offend someone with what you really think, you are ‘settling’, and shutting down your own voice.
Conclusion
If you practice these, your energy will shift, and you’ll become the change. New positive energy flows in from all sorts of places without all the drama!
Where have you limited your own freedom of expression because you are judging or are afraid someone will judge you? Please share your comments below!
