It’s one of the most important spiritual practices of all: the art of being fully present.
The greatest most enduring leaders have this ability of making you feel like you are the only one in the room. You feel seen and heard, and your entire being feels lit up.
We know this experience when we get together with the kindred spirits in our lives. Time disappears as you effortlessly move into the magical space of being present.
We can feel stressed at holiday time for many reasons. Maybe it’s knowing you’ll be spending intimate time with certain individuals that can be difficult. Perhaps you’ve faced a devastating loss whether a job or a loved one, and just smiling feels hard.
You may be overwhelmed in all that needs DOING around the holidays, but want to find a way of BEING in your peace, and joyful connection no matter how busy you are, and who you’re with.
It may sound impossible, but it all begins with the practice of being fully present.
There’s a different quality of stillness here that is not just about feeling gratitude or journaling. Nor is it only about mindful meditation clearing your mind of busy thoughts. Being fully present is a special combination of being in your stillness non-judgmentally while connected to a divine internal source that carries you through your life adventure.
Having Faith
At this time of year, we are asked to stand in a much bigger truth about each other. That there’s a collective consciousness no matter what devastating confusion we see happening in our world, and our communities.
We have to trust that we are all on a path moving forward – ascending as time ticks by. It requires that we lean into a sacred place that holds a faith beyond what we see and hear so we can learn to be present with those around us.
The noise coming from outside can be very disturbing, especially these days where we have access to all that’s going wrong in our world with a click of a button. It can make us dwell on what’s wrong in our own space or call us forward.
It’s challenging to seek out the light between the spaces, but unless we first become present within, our own wholeness can’t
Being present this holiday within your own inner circle can move mountains because your energy is like a signal out that spreads – no matter how big or small, it has the same powerful force.
Learning How to Be Fully Present
One winter day, I was driving through my neighbourhood with my 3 children fast asleep in their car seats. I suddenly noticed how beautiful the newly fallen snow looked on the trees lining the street. I sighed.
Did it always look this stunning, and I never reallynoticed? It took my breath away. I’d missed this feeling of presence with nature for how many years?
It was a seed of discovering how to be present. A sense of awe connected to a greater whole that lives in nature – it was just the beginning.
The Greatest Gift You Can Give
When you are fully present with someone, you can reach way over into someone else’s space by listening nonjudgmentally with genuine interest from your soul-mind. It has that same sense of awe, but with another soul.
It requires a step away from our analytical mind that loves to make assumptions, and draw conclusions from the smallest pieces of what we do see and hear.
Our true presence listens openly to someone’s different truth where both your experiences are right for you even if you disagree. There’s a deeper trust you reach having faith in someone that holds the present space for you both.
The greatest gift you can give is allowing someone to be
Living Your Truth
Being present means becoming more and more aligned with what’s true for you. You can trust yourself because your outer experiences start reflecting back to you what you most desire without you having to demand, control or go chasing after it.
Small moments of hearing what you long to hear. Feelings you didn’t know were inside you to feel. Unexpected surprises you want, but aren’t outwardly asking for.
You no longer feel offended or upset by how others show up. What others say and do is about them with their own truth. It doesn’t mean you agree or condone everything – you simply find that way to be in the moment not resisting life.
Most of us are looking for truth, and problem solving in the wrong direction – outside ourselves when the real answers can only be found inside. What you’re drawn to see, and hear in the global media of news, and entertainment is a reflection of what’s seeking answers inside you.
Pay close attention here – it’s not the other way around. That movie was great? A song rings your truth bells? A book brings fun, distraction or insights? The career you’re in? The activities you enjoy? Choices you think you’re making.
It’s not these things that draw you in to choose them – it’s what these are pulling out of you that resonates, and keeps bringing them into your space.
It’s the same with the people you have surrounding you : )
Your Tribe
You are not so much choosing who you surround yourself with – your energy attracts them to you. If you don’t have amazing people right now in your life you can trust, notice what energies you bring that aren’t aligned with who you are.
Wherever you are pretending, holding back, not speaking what’s true for you will mirror what comes back in the people around you. If you struggle with someone in your life, something in them is showing a part of you that needs healing or growing.
The more you can trust yourself, the more people who trust themselves form your circle.
Being present requires us to be with our insides first. Am I OK with me? Do I enjoy my own company because I know what I stand for? Even if you don’t get approval, or material rewards, but something far richer – you not betraying yourself.
There’s a lot less external stress with others when internally you’ve learned to be present with you.
A different quality of the way you experience life emerges when you tap into the light of your BEING in the world, DOING what you do.
It’s this quality you bring when you are fully present.
11 Practices for Being Present this Holiday:
- Spend some time visioning. What’s the vision you have for the holiday season? Can you imagine the fun? Can you picture the ease? How much love you’ll experience? Visioning includes how you’re
FEELING in that moment – holding the energy of what joy means for you. If you can’t imagine it, it’s not on the radar. Infuse a moment of stillness first thing in the morning. 5 minutes quieting your mind to be with all of you – mind, body, and soul. Ask for guidance from your divine self & listen. Set your intentions for what you want to offer the world today.- Practice kindness in the little moments. Give your child, or spouse the supporting words, and reassurance they need, but we often forget to say. Silently thank the distracted driver who just cut you off because you just got a chance to practice patience.
- Drive in total silence. See what you notice around you. Listen for any ideas or insights that come in – they often do here. Toss aside any ‘noisy thoughts’ that may be analyzing the past or worrying about the future.
- Whatever you listen to in the car – choose wisely. What you take in effects your energy. Listen consciously to the words being said, to the melody being played. (Oprah’s free soul conversations podcast gives me some of life’s greatest spiritual lessons every day.)
- In the shower, feel the water on your skin, listen to the sound of the water, and clear your mind into a relaxed place instead of bringing your whole day’s agenda in there with you.
- Schedule empty space on your calendar. It’s a secret to ease. Having space to use your time creatively by letting your heart lead, and practice going with the flow
- Create healthy boundaries with anyone in your life that drains you. Say No thank you. Yes, this may include
relatives, and long-time friends. - Manage expectations. Be clear on what you’re willing, and not willing to do. Do not sign up for anything that doesn’t bring you joy or meaning.
- Simplify. Less is more. Giving an experience that
create a lasting loving memory goes a long way – right over to the other side : ). - Spend quality time with your tribe – people you can share your truth with who won’t judge you. It’s a small circle, but an eternal one that grows deep and wide over time.
The more present you become with you, the more you unveil remembering who you really are.
No matter what happens, you can trust in you as a spiritual being having all the different human experiences that come your way.
When you’re fully present, peace, joy, and love can’t help but be yours to experience this holiday.
I want to leave you with the Xmas Carol that always resonated most with me – now I know why. Do you hear what I hear?
Merry Christmas, and Happy Holidays!