{"id":4184,"date":"2015-06-04T14:25:49","date_gmt":"2015-06-04T21:25:49","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/carolynhidalgo.com\/\/?p=4184"},"modified":"2023-03-22T10:11:21","modified_gmt":"2023-03-22T10:11:21","slug":"finding-serenity-in-the-chaos","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/carolynhidalgo.com\/staging\/finding-serenity-in-the-chaos\/","title":{"rendered":"Finding Serenity In the Chaos"},"content":{"rendered":"<h2>Super Soul Sunday \u2014 Girls Night in a Twist<\/h2>\n<p>Last Friday I joined forces with\u00a02 colleagues for our 3rd\u00a0women\u2019s event: \u201cSuper Soul Friday \u2013 Girls Night In with a Twist\u201d.<\/p>\n<p>The topic\u00a0for last Friday was \u201cFinding Peace in the Midst of Chaos\u201d.\u00a0What does it take to stay calm when\u00a0faced with storms that inevitably show up in our lives?<\/p>\n<p><a href=\"https:\/\/carolynhidalgo.com\/\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/06\/SSFCollage.jpg\"><img fetchpriority=\"high\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"aligncenter size-medium wp-image-4191\" src=\"https:\/\/carolynhidalgo.com\/\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/06\/SSFCollage-300x225.jpg\" alt=\"SSFCollage\" width=\"300\" height=\"225\" \/><\/a><\/p>\n<p>We touched on the wisdom of 3 leading experts each of us resonated most strongly with\u00a0for\u00a0finding our individual ways back to serenity. It got inspired when I invited some girlfriends over to watch Oprah\u2019s Super Soul Sunday, but wanted to create a structure for deeper discussion!<\/p>\n<p>I was drawn to Jon Kabat-Zinn, author of \u2018Wherever You Go, There You Are \u2013 Mindfulness Meditation in Every Day Life\u2019. His calling to bridge art and science (mother an artist; father a molecular immunologist) resonated.\u00a0I\u00a0had a lot of questions about spiritual\u00a0realities\u00a0growing up surrounded by\u00a0a\u00a0strong\u00a0medical-based family.<\/p>\n<p>After watching \u201cThe Secret\u201d documentary back in 2006, it was the realization that EVERYTHING is\u00a0energy \u2013 including us, that brought spirituality and science together for me in a profound way.<\/p>\n<p>Here\u00a0are\u00a0the clips I shared:<\/p>\n<p><a href=\"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/watch?v=Bl7_vFWZqkU\">Having a Morning Ritual<\/a>\u00a0(3 minutes)<\/p>\n<p><a href=\"http:\/\/www.oprah.com\/own-super-soul-sunday\/How-Mindfulness-Can-Restore-Balance-to-Your-Life-Video\">How to Restore Balance<\/a>\u00a0(2 minutes)<\/p>\n<p>Jon defines mindfulness as \u201cpaying attention on purpose, in the present moment, <strong>non-judgmentally<\/strong>.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>There\u2019s a widely held belief that\u00a0non-judgment means having NO\u00a0good or bad thoughts towards anything. Also that meditation\u00a0in stillness requires\u00a0having \u2018no thought\u2019 to clear your mind. I don\u2019t exactly agree.<\/p>\n<p>You have between 50,000-70,000 thoughts a\u00a0day, and majority of it is\u00a0\u2018negative noise\u2019 \u2013 you can\u2019t just turn them all off! It\u2019s more about noticing the thoughts you are choosing to think from a deeper\u00a0awareness, and how they are affecting you.<\/p>\n<p>Judging anything as\u00a0\u2018right\/wrong\u2019 or \u2018good\/bad\u2019 tends to\u00a0lead\u00a0to an\u00a0\u2018inferior\/superior\u2019 or \u2018better\/worse\u2019\u00a0perception\u00a0where the ego shows up so\u00a0I find it\u2019s more valuable to ask:<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>Is this healthy or unhealthy for my well-being?\u201d<\/li>\n<li>Is this thought constructive or destructive to how I feel?\u201d<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>In short \u2013 is this\u00a0working for me?<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: center;\"><strong><span style=\"text-align: center;\">There\u2019s a difference between stress that\u2019s destructive to your well-being,<\/span><\/strong><\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: center;\"><strong>and struggle that helps you\u00a0grow.<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>Some\u00a0of us strive in chaos.\u00a0As a financial executive, my husband is one of them. He\u2019s drawn\u00a0to\u00a0companies that\u00a0need major upheavals to survive, and thrive. He enjoys this environment, and like\u00a0most guys \u2013 getting results\u00a0is highly motivating \ud83d\ude42<\/p>\n<p>It\u2019s one of his strengths: staying calm enough to focus on key areas that require his attention\u00a0when numerous\u00a0balls are in the air. Which ones do you allow to drop?<\/p>\n<p>This kind of\u00a0\u2018chaos\u2019\u00a0is really a \u2018challenge\u2019, or \u2018struggle\u2019 which can be\u00a0exciting where\u00a0things are moving, and grooving. There\u2019s endless things to do that involves\u00a0new learning, and solving problems \u2013 all great stuff!<\/p>\n<p>The problem is if\u00a0anything consumes so much\u00a0time & energy (even what\u00a0you enjoy) when you finally stop to slow down, you end up\u00a0putting a plug\u00a0in the wheel of all the \u2018doing\u2019.<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>Do you\u00a0feel a bit empty when you slow down?<\/li>\n<li>Are you needing to zone out in front of the tv to relax?<\/li>\n<li>Do\u00a0you\u00a0feel lazy, antsy, or unproductive if you aren\u2019t doing something?<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>What\u00a0becomes\u00a0stressful to your well-being? Disengagement with yourself on the other parts of you that matter. Are you\u00a0slowing down to notice\u2026<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>You\u2019re not\u00a0making time to exercise\u00a0whatever that is for you<\/li>\n<li>Eating out a lot adds unwanted\u00a0weight, not to mention digestive issues!<\/li>\n<li>Spending quality time is\u00a0limited to doing necessary household responsibilities<\/li>\n<li>You miss having deeper conversations with\u00a0your spouse, or children<\/li>\n<li>You\u2019re having surface conversations as opposed to building meaningful friendships where you laugh so hard you cry<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p style=\"text-align: left;\">I grew up in an environment where \u201cgetting things done\u201d was highly valued. Working hard, and having an independent profession defined success. Everything was highly structured. At the time, it\u00a0was worked well, but I could sense something was missing that \u2018being mindful\u2019 helped me see.<\/p>\n<p>There\u00a0was more to life than <em>doing<\/em>. There was also <em>being<\/em>. Just noticing. Being present. The squeal of laughter\u00a0from my children who have some of the best moments\u00a0during their\u00a0routine\u00a0breakfast.\u00a0The knowing\u00a0in my friend\u2019s eye when I sense she\u00a0feels better after we talk about what\u2019s <em>really<\/em> going on. The look, and feel\u00a0in my husband\u2019s touch.<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: center;\"><strong>Intimacy, and connection on the soul level. I was missing it, <\/strong><\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: center;\"><strong>and I began to find\u00a0it when I practiced\u00a0being mindful.<\/strong><\/p>\n<p><strong>In\u00a0the\u00a0midst<\/strong> of any experience that isn\u2019t working for you (conflict, frustration, confusion, disappointment) is when we\u00a0are most blind to what\u2019s happening, and the greatest opportunity to grow.<\/p>\n<p>We react from our conditioning that often involved criticizing, and judging \u2013 blaming, and justifying our own stance of why we need to understand, follow or agree with someone else\u2019s \u2018right way\u2019 \u2013 even when it\u2019s not working for us!<\/p>\n<p>Practicing mindfulness allows you to <strong>notice<\/strong>\u00a0\u201cwhat is really going on \u2013 with me, with them, in this situation?\u201d\u00a0How much am I willing to step into my own truth of why\u00a0this matters? What\u2019s not working for me I need to face?<\/p>\n<p>Mindfulness\u00a0brings you to\u00a0a place that\u2019s\u00a0\u2018judgment-free\u2019 where your energy feels\u00a0calm. It\u00a0brings you back to feeling\u00a0<em>whole<\/em>\u00a0exactly where you are, doing the best you can because you can trust your\u00a0SELF \u2013 your heart, mind, and soul.<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: center;\"><strong>You can see, and hear others more clearly <\/strong><\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: center;\"><strong>because you can see, and hear yourself.<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>Angry, and frustrated with someone? What\u2019s underneath your\u00a0anger that may be creating it in the first place? It\u2019s not them \u2013 they are just being themselves. It\u2019s something that you value being stepped on \u2013 perhaps something you are not seeing fully.<\/p>\n<p>Get curious. Ask questions. From here, how can respond in the best way for your own well-being?<\/p>\n<p>Sad, and disappointed by how someone has treated you? What is really being stepped on that\u2019s important to you that apparently\u00a0isn\u2019t what someone else may value? What\u00a0can\u00a0you do about it from this place? What will you share? What do you need to let go of?<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: center;\"><strong>Mindfulness = Awareness<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>One of most powerful ways to be mindful is to be in gratitude. At first you may have to think: \u2018what am I thankful for?\u2019 Then practice writing down 3 gratitudes\u00a0every morning\u00a0in a journal. Eventually you\u2019ll\u00a0notice you FEEL\u00a0a sense of gratefulness wherever you go.<\/p>\n<p>Your\u00a0awareness shifts until you ARE grateful as opposed to practicing to feel grateful or thinking\u00a0\u2018I\u2019m\u00a0grateful because I\u2026.\u2019 \u2013 there\u2019s no \u2018thinking\u2019, there\u2019s only being.<\/p>\n<h3>You get out of your head, and live into your awareness.<\/h3>\n<p>Finding spaces to be mindful in your every day life is essential. In the shower \u2013 are you thinking about your entire day instead of\u00a0being present?<\/p>\n<p>Do you\u00a0spend time\u00a0in nature?<\/p>\n<p>Will\u00a0you drive in silence?<\/p>\n<p>Can you wake up in the morning, and hold an intention for your day ahead?<\/p>\n<p>Your greatest\u00a0insights, and creative \u2018out of the box\u2019 thinking shows up\u00a0when you practice connecting to your inner wise self or your \u2018pilot light\u2019. It\u2019s where you can\u00a0best\u00a0navigate the waves in the midst of any\u00a0storm.<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: left;\">Mindfulness is really a\u00a0practice of <strong>slowing down to speed up<\/strong> that brings more joy, peace, even\u00a0productivity!<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: left;\">Jon describes mindfulness as\u00a0\u201ca love affair with life, with reality, and imagination with the beauty of your own being\u2026a gateway into the full dimensionality of being human\u2026where there\u2019s infinite depth.\u201d<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: left;\">When\u00a0you\u00a0master the art of\u00a0mindfulness without judgment, the serenity you discover within leads you back to your true nature: LOVE, which as you know, conquers any storm.<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: center;\"><a href=\"https:\/\/carolynhidalgo.com\/\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/06\/LoveIsKind.jpg\"><img decoding=\"async\" class=\"aligncenter size-medium wp-image-4246\" src=\"https:\/\/carolynhidalgo.com\/\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/06\/LoveIsKind-238x300.jpg\" alt=\"LoveIsKind\" width=\"238\" height=\"300\" \/><\/a><\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: center;\">If you found this post valuable, please like below, share the LOVE with your friends. I would LOVE\u00a0your comments.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Super Soul Sunday \u2014 Girls Night in a Twist Last Friday I joined forces with\u00a02 colleagues for our 3rd\u00a0women\u2019s event: \u201cSuper Soul Friday \u2013 Girls Night In with a Twist\u201d. The topic\u00a0for last Friday was \u201cFinding Peace in the Midst of Chaos\u201d.\u00a0What does it take to stay calm when\u00a0faced with storms that inevitably show up [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_mo_disable_npp":"","_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_active":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_note":"","_monsterinsights_sitenote_category":0,"footnotes":""},"categories":[56],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-4184","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-spirituality-serenity"],"acf":[],"aioseo_notices":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/carolynhidalgo.com\/staging\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4184","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/carolynhidalgo.com\/staging\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/carolynhidalgo.com\/staging\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/carolynhidalgo.com\/staging\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/carolynhidalgo.com\/staging\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=4184"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/carolynhidalgo.com\/staging\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4184\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":9390,"href":"https:\/\/carolynhidalgo.com\/staging\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4184\/revisions\/9390"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/carolynhidalgo.com\/staging\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=4184"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/carolynhidalgo.com\/staging\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=4184"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/carolynhidalgo.com\/staging\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=4184"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}