Children want to please their parents. Despite pushback you may experience or times they refuse to follow instructions, what kids want is connection with their caregivers.
This desire to please can backfire when you want the world for your children, and they feel like they have to deliver something that might not be appropriate or correct for them in the moment. Expectations backfire to create a silent pressure for children to be more than what they can see in themselves.
What kids need the most is connection with their parents and the adults who love them most. As parents, we need to make sure we haven’t put up walls or blockades that prevent this connection, no matter how well-intentioned we may be.